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There are
Americans who visit France and come back saying "the
French are so rude". I feel differently. I think Americans
perceive French behavior "rude" because it doesn't
follow American rules. You can't assume that everyone in
France should speak English. You can't approach a French
stranger with a big American hello and "how are you"
and expect them to respond in kind. However, if you look
them in the eye, give a slight nod with a gentle hello,
they will respond favorably.
Most French
people I meet are subtle. Dignified. They are not loud,
and they are reserved in their expressions. We like to say
words like "great", "magnificent", "marvelous".
The French will say "pas mal" (not bad) even if
they win the lottery! And if you think Eurpoeans don't have
their own negative idea of an American, you're wrong. Most
young Europeans I've met view Americans as "fake"
and loud, since we DO tend to have big hellos and smiles
for strangers and ask "how are you" and walk away
before a response. Because one of our first questions when
getting to know someone is "what do you do for a living?"
So make a conscious effort to show the French that we can
adjust to our surroundings, and that we don't expect to
enter a foreign country and have everything be just as we
wish it to be. Go to France expecting it to be very different
from the US. Because it is.
I wasn't able
to completely forget my American roots during my stay. I
was still the one getting strange looks wearing my sandals
in the cold (with socks of course). I was still the one
with the loudest laugh. And I could never quite get my voice
to that loud-enough-for-the-waiter-to-hear-but-not-nearby-diners
level. I also never looked French, even when I did leave
my sandals at home. I will never have the French flair.
I will always feel a bit like the awkward teenager as I
stumble my way around Europe. I was very lucky in that my
french friends insisted my American idiosyncrasies were
charming, and deserving of acceptance.
So look at
the French in a new light. They have a rich culture, a rich
past. I can attest to the fact that if you are kind, polite,
and "go with the flow", you will gain friends,
and perhaps even improve foreign relations. Bon courage!
P.S. I must,
with great joy, point out my limited use of exclamation
points. I tend to write rather enthusiastically, expecting
every reader to feel my overstated American joy. I'm quite
proud I managed to tone down my personality for this bit.
See, anyone
can do it. (!)
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